GEN XXX!!!

Recently I have delved into the differences between the generations and how they get along with each other. There are currently seven living generations starting with the Greatest, Silent, Baby Boomers, Gen X, Millennials, Gen Z, and lastly Alpha. Each has their own tendencies based on the generations that came before ie... their parents or even grandparents. Today I'm going to be focusing on Generation X. My generation and probably most of my thousands of dedicated readers!!! I will share with you my experience growing up as a Gen Xer. 

Being born into Baby Boomer mother and Silent Generation dad, my parents are about ten years apart in age, was mostly great for me. My dad worked 2 jobs, construction during the day and bouncing at night and was hammered most of that time. With the exception of Sundays. Which he woke early and cooked breakfast listening to Patsy Cline on the 8 track player as loud as possible it seemed. He also sang his little rhymes while making the eggs and bacon. you know the classics, " Lady of Spain I adore you, lift up your skirt I'll explore you!!!" and "Mary my darling, Mary my duck, come in the garden, and I'll give you a Flower!!!" Ahhh that Big Jake was a charmer I tell you!!! The rest of Sunday was mostly just chill until dinner, which was always a huge affair. Back in the day, my family always ate dinner together every night. But Sundays were always spaghetti and meatballs and family was extended to friends and boy/girlfriends. and you best eat your pasta, right Julie? If not, Cheryl would take you in the tub and smash it in your FACE!!! Might explain some things about my little sis??? That'll have to wait for another blog though!!!

With the above information, it's probably plain to see my siblings and I were raised by my mother Cheryl Ann Bennett. Or so it would seem??? My mothers parenting skills were basically, as soon as these 4 fucks get up they need to get their little asses outside. Which was fine by me!!! I was happy to be unleashed on the world and away from Cheryl. I also knew the only time I was to come back was possibly lunch and most definitely dinner time which was 6PM. My friends and I spent most of our time outdoors either in the two close by fields, making underground forts, playing football or soccer, or shooting each other with BB guns. What could go wrong?

Making underground forts consist of usually digging a six foot deep hole as big as possible, bonus if you could dig more than one space out and have "rooms". For the roof we usually found/stole lumber from nearby construction sites and cut down branches from the trees and put on top to camouflage the forts. Double extra bonus if you found/stole block or plumbing pipe to make a fireplace in your fort. Which at our ripe ages seemed a necessary feature. And everyone knows fires and pvc are great for young growing lungs!!! There was also the one or two occasion where the entire field may have  been alledgy set ablaze and fire trucks were necessary to gain control of the blaze.  Again Allegedly.

As mentioned BB guns were also a favorite past time for my friends and I. We would pair off in teams make forts and fox holes and commence to shooting at each other. The only rules were no aiming at the enemy's eyes and the BB guns can only be pumped twice to keep the velocity to a minimum. What actually took place was inevitably someone would get angry after being shot and pump their gun up as much as possible to get revenge. This ultimately stopped the BB gun wars when one of the participants had to go to the hospital to have a BB removed from his stomach.

Last thing that happened in the woods was kind of guy thing. Sorry ladies. Remember these are the days sans cell phones so what's a young man to do to figure out what a naked women looks like? Well let me tell you back in the day the woods were where all the porn magazines were gloriously discarded. Assumingly by older gentlemen, who may or may not have used them for their own gratification and now spent, tossed them out their car windows. Just a theory. Sorry again ladies. As gross as this seems to me typing this, at the time it was like christmas had came early!!! Never mind, that is Disgusting!!! My 14 year old self was a huge pig with an ever deepening crackly voice. My friends and I eventually graduated from the paper form of porn and somehow absconded with one of our dads porn VHS tapes. Holy shit the technology!!!

Yours truly became the holder of the tape which I not so cleverly hid in my bedroom. That's right folks, I was the gatekeeper for the VHS of "Debbie Does Dallas" which was marked on the outside of the cover "The Joy Of Sex". Why I don't rightly know. Probably whoever stole the tape from their parents got the covers messed up. It hardly matters, days after becoming the keeper of the tape Cheryl found it and there was a discussion with my parental units about the unfortunate finding. I wish the discussion was the ending of this tale, but that would not be very Bennet like. After being told by my Mother that I should not be hiding things like this from my parents and honesty was the best policy yadda yadda yadda something something something..... the three of us should watch this tape together tonight!!! Say that again??? So that night Cheryl, Big Jake and myself sat down to watch young Debbie do things that seem to go way above the call for someone trying to make a cheer squad. I mean Debbie really wanted to be a freaking cheerleader!!! I guess it was for the Dallas Cowboys, you know Americas Team!!! When the credits finally rolled, my mother's demeanor had changed. "That is the most disgusting thing I've ever seen!!! Get it out of this house!!!" So much for being ok with it and just mad at me for hiding the tape. I am now #1 disgusting son. And for Big Jake,"That was alright , but I'd rather be a participant" he added.

As you can see, growing up as a Generation XXX children was not all that bad. Sure...we basically raised ourselves, stole from job sites, did severe damage to our internal organs, shot at each other with BB Guns and learned about the birds and bees from sticky magazines in the woods and stolen porn videos. And I'm full aware this is only one Gen XXXers take of his early life. But look at me now Motherfuckers!!! I'm doing all right.

Till Next time......




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